Making the Ask
Getting Assistance by Asking for It
Recently, I have had multiple conversations with students about “making the ask.” Sometimes, I talk about this idea with the same students every semester. Depending on needs, I share this idea with students near the start of the semester, as they face a challenge or closer to finals. So, I feel like this is a perfect time to share this exact idea with all of you so you can make use of it throughout this semester and your time as a student.
What does “Making the Ask” mean?
Making the ask is asking for help from faculty, staff, peers, or other individuals on campus when you could benefit from some flexibility or additional resources.
I like this particular terminology because it highlights that, as a student, it's your responsibility to seek help, while the person you're asking can choose how they reply. I also think the term “making the ask” can apply to your undergraduate experience and post-graduate plans because everyone needs help at some point, and no one is expected to be an expert at everything.
Why is this skill important?
The skill of asking for support will help you throughout your college experience, career, and in life. Knowing that you are not able to accomplish a certain task and then communicating your specific need for support will help you to be a strong colleague and professional. Additionally, by openly acknowledging your limitations and requesting support, you can earn your future or current supervisor's trust. This openness may lead to them assigning you more responsibilities, furthering your career, and fostering a positive perception of you.
Why should I “Make the Ask”?
I like to share with students that asking for support cannot make your current situation worse than it already is. You may get a “no” from the person you ask for help, which maintains your current situation. On the other hand, if you get a “yes” as the answer, then you can receive the help you need to be successful. Frequently, when students make the ask, faculty or staff members are willing to help.
The other reason I suggest students make the ask is because your peers are already asking for flexibility; you just may not know about it. And because they ask for assistance, they are getting a “yes” from individuals on campus. Sometimes this additional help allows them to get stronger grades. I know you probably believe you are the only one asking for support, but trust me, you aren’t!
What Kind of Help Can I Ask For?
There are so many asks students can request. In my experience, students often ask for extended deadlines, tutoring, additional grant money to help with their bill, flexibility with academic policies, a different exam format, and more. Basically, if you need some help with an issue you are facing, you just need to make the ask.
Recently, a friend of mine needed two elective credits to graduate from her Master’s program. I suggested that she ask her academic advisor for permission to either do an independent study, transfer a course, or get approval for a course from another department to count toward her graduation. Luckily, because she asked her advisor, they were willing to be flexible and allow her to pursue a non-traditional avenue to finish her degree. The only reason she was allowed to finish in a non-traditional manner was because she asked for help.
How to “Make the Ask”
First, compile the facts. This can be done by answering a few basic questions.
What challenges are you facing?
Why do you need flexibility?
What is the policy you need support with?
What additional factors are at play?
Pro Tip: If you are one or two semesters away from your graduation and flexibility would help you graduate, make that situation clear to the person you are asking for help. Sometimes people are more likely to be flexible with rules and accommodate if it could prevent you from graduating on time.
Pro Tip: Also, make sure to share any actions you've already taken by yourself. This indicates that you've invested effort in trying to resolve the issue independently before asking for help. By outlining your previous steps, provide the person you're reaching out to with all the background information needed, enabling them to pursue different support strategies to resolve your issue.
Then, you need to make sure you are talking to someone on campus who can actually help with the process. For example, you do not want to ask your Hall Director for help with an academic policy; that is not their area of expertise. If you are not sure who to ask for support, go to someone on campus you already have a connection with. They may not be the right person in the right department, but they can help guide you toward someone who can get support.
Finally, your job is to ask a very clear and concrete question that informs the person you are asking for help about your ideal outcome. You may have other options to pursue, but your job is to ask about the one you would like to pursue the most. This way, if the response is "no," you have a backup option that you can ask for next.
Examples of Making the Ask
Example 1: Deadline Extension from Faculty Who Know You
Hi Professor,
I wanted to reach out about the paper due on Friday of this week in your [Course Name] class this semester. I have been working on the assignment, but due to unforeseen personal issues, I have not had sufficient time to dedicate to the assignment.
If possible, I would really appreciate it if I could submit it to you on Tuesday next week, so I have some more time to dedicate to submitting this assignment.
Thank you for your help with this issue.
[Your Name]
Example 2: Academic Policy Exception
Hi Academic Advisor,
With the spring semester starting soon and my pending graduation in May, I wanted to reach out about my courses from the fall semester. I know that I currently have a “D” in a course that is required for my major. I also know, according to the academic policies, that a “D” in a course means it won't count towards my Business major. I checked the academic catalog and the website for business major requirements to confirm this.
Although I did connect with the tutoring center last semester and met with my faculty member, I just struggled in this course, and I think my performance on the final greatly impacted my grade.
Because the course is not offered in the spring semester for me to retake it, is there any way for my fall “D” grade to count toward my major? If not, I would have to move my graduation to December, and this would be the only requirement I have left to complete in the fall.
Thank you for your help with this issue.
[Your Name]
If Necessary, Ask for Support with the Issue You are Facing
Lastly, if you make an ask, which, after reading this post, I hope you do, do not be afraid to ask someone for assistance with this process. To help ensure you are in the best position to receive the assistance you need, you may want to contact someone on campus who knows you well and see if they can help support your cause.
So, now that you have some insight regarding how to ask for flexibility, do not be afraid to make the ask. I encourage you to try it out and see what you learn about the process itself, and maybe, just maybe, you will get the response you were hoping for.
Image credit: Leeloo The First via Pexels.